I Wish I Was a Stakeholder

by lewwaters

 

College 4Submitted by Professor Robert Dean

Shill

The Columbian article, Group forms in support of new I-5 bridge about two wealthy engineers forming an advocacy group of other self-interested CRC proponents brings to mind one my kids’ favorite bedtime books – I Wish That I Had Duck Feet by Dr. Seuss.

Sorry to butcher the first few stanzas but my mind tends to twist things around after mulling on them.

I wish I was a stakeholder and I can tell you why.
You can make a splash as a stakeholder and get a piece of the pie.

I wish I was a stakeholder. No vote, no vote for me.
The man down at the newspaper would not let it happen, you see.

If I was a stakeholder I could laugh at David Madore.
I would say, you don’t have my wealth. I’m the richest and I have more.

I think it would be very good to make commuters pay.
Only other stakeholders can profit in this way.

But…

Our Congresswoman wouldn’t like it. She would say,
Get off my floor!
She would say,
You take your campaign contributions and you take them out that door!
Don’t ever come in here again with dirty hands, now don’t!

So, I guess I can’t be a stakeholder,
I would like to but I won’t.

Apologies to Dr. Seuss

One Comment to “I Wish I Was a Stakeholder”

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